The Pressure of ‘Self Care’

Monday, February 3, 2020 Permalink
Landscape of lake with mountains in the background. In the foreground a long wooden dock leads towards the lake and a man is sitting at the end

Self care is definitely the buzzword of the moment isn't it. You read about it everywhere you go, and for so long it got my back up. Whenever I saw people talking about self care, it was all about long bubble baths, trips to the spa, getting your nails done, or your hair cut. All things that I just didn't have the time or money for, and it just felt like one more thing on the list that I didn't have time to tick off. One more pressure. One more thing that I wasn't managing to keep on top of, and one more thing to feel guilty for not doing. I've written a lot about how much I struggled in the ...

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How I’ve Changed As A Parent | AD

Monday, December 10, 2018 Permalink
How I've changed as a parent

This is paid collaboration as part of my Ambassador role with Johnson’s Baby Perfectionism is an impossible thing when it comes to parenting. I’ve always been a perfectionist. I was the child in school who always got 10/10, and I’ve gone through life always aiming to do my absolute best. But more than anything else, being a mum is the thing that I’ve wanted to be perfect at. I’m sure it’s something that all new parents feel - that overwhelming sense of responsibility as you realise that you are the person that needs to look after this tiny, helpless little being, and everything in you wants to be the very best parent you can for them. In that first year with Max, ...

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It Might Not Be That Bad After All…

Friday, November 9, 2018 Permalink
Shot looking down at little boy playing with Lego on wooden floor

It's fair to say that I've had my doubts and misgivings about how ready Max was for school. He's always seemed young for his age, and I was concerned that the emphasis on reading and writing would turn him off of learning full stop. If it was up to me, I think I'd have kept him home with me forever! But something changed my mind last week. It was a tiny moment in the grand scheme of things. I've been making a big effort to give Max some short one-to-one time where he gets to choose the activity. He chose a Lego set, which we'd built together once before, and I noticed back then just how much direction Max needed to keep ...

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I’m not cut out for life as a school mum!

Monday, October 29, 2018 Permalink
Pile of childrens books with cup on top

It's fair to say that I spent the last year burying my head in the sand about Max starting school. I've made no secret of the fact that I would happily have kept him home with me for much longer, and that I didn't really feel he was ready. My little boy just wasn't grown up enough to be heading off to school 5 days a week! Over the summer, I put so much effort into making sure that Max was ready. I read all those lists of things that your child should be able to do before starting school, and we worked on each thing slowly. Can use cutlery? Check. Can recognise their own name? Check. Can wipe their bottom? ...

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What To Do When Parents Won’t Let You Visit Their New Baby…

Friday, June 15, 2018 Permalink
Newborn baby lying on blue and pink striped blanket, swaddled in a white blanket, and scrunching its eyes closed while crying

I was on the train the other day, and I was sat behind a group of young women who were discussing one of their sister in laws, and how she'd recently had a baby. The girl leading the conversation was very put out that she'd not been able to visit to see the baby yet (a week after it had been born), and that her mother in law was devastated to have only been allowed to see the baby twice. They were very focused on the fact that apparently she'd had an straightforward birth, and unanimous in saying that when they had a baby they would be wanting everyone to see it. The phrase no-one has a right to stop people ...

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Rediscovering ‘Me’ Post Baby and Being Braver

Wednesday, May 16, 2018 Permalink
Katy, holding baby Ben, stood in front of wisteria, dressed in pale green dress and yellow saltwater sandals

I remember one of the things I wanted to achieve 2 years ago was to be more present in photos, both on the blog and off it. I think I did really well through pregnancy, but since having Ben nearly a year ago now, I've definitely fallen back into obscurity. I looked back over my Instagram feed the other day and realised there were barely any photos of me, just of the boys. That first year after you have a baby is such a difficult one for a woman and I think my confidence really took a knock. It's understandable - your body emerges from pregnancy looking so different than it did before. Even aside from the body hangups, you're left ...

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To Myself As A First Time Mum

Monday, March 5, 2018 Permalink
Katy and Max - Day 1

Becoming a parent was the most life changing event in my life. It quite literally turned my life upside down - I'd always considered myself to be quite a selfish person, and yet suddenly I had this little being, entirely dependent on me, who I was desperate to do the best for. It's a really scary time. It's crammed to the brim with emotions, and you're trying to learn things you've never done before with next to nothing in the way of an instruction manual. There is so much that I'd want to tell myself as a first time parent...   Trust Your Instincts As a first time mum, I scoffed at the phrase 'mother's intuition'. I'd never done this before, how could ...

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From One To Two Is Easy, They Said…

Tuesday, February 6, 2018 Permalink
Max and Ben lying on fluffy rug, with Max touching Ben's nose

I have to admit that I was nervous about the jump from one to two children. If you're familiar with my blog, you'll know that Max, my first son, is quite a demanding child who does need a lot of attention, so I worried a lot about having to split my attention in two. But not to worry, everyone said - the jump from one to two is the easiest! From none to one is hard - your life is completely turned upside down and you're learning everything from scratch. From 2 to 3 is hard - suddenly the parent to child ratio is tipped in favour of the kids and chaos ensues. But 1 to 2? You'll be fine! 7 ...

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Why Every Family Should Have A Newborn Photoshoot

Tuesday, January 23, 2018 Permalink

One of the things that I was determined to do when our second baby came along was a newborn photo shoot. We didn't do one with Max, and although I treasure the photos from those early days, with my love of photography, I wish we'd managed to arrange a professional to visit us to capture something more special than the sleep deprived shots we took ourselves. I didn't just want a styled photoshoot of our newborn though, I wanted photos of all of us, as a new family. I did wonder whether I was slightly mad to invite a photographer into our home, only a week after giving birth. I'd still probably look about 5 months pregnant, the sleep deprivation would ...

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Lost in Motherhood

Tuesday, November 14, 2017 Permalink
Brunette woman stood in bay window holding newborn baby, dressed in blue dress

I was walking past a mirror the other day and I caught a brief glimpse of my reflection and couldn't help but look back to have a proper look. These days I don't seem to get time to put on makeup, or do my hair, so I wanted to check that I didn't look too much of a state. But I looked back and did an almost comical double take - I didn't recognise the person staring back at me. She didn't look a state - hair was brushed, if not styled, she didn't have lipstick on her teeth - but it wasn't the image I have of myself in my head. She looked more tired, more drab, more frumpy, ...

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