Your Own Room – The Ordinary Moments

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That moment when you walk out of the hospital, carrying your newborn baby, is such a hugely emotional one in every parent’s life. The realisation that this precious little squirmy bundle is yours to take home. Your heart is swelling with pride, and love, and also fear. Fear, because this little creature is so tiny, so vulnerable, and is dependent on you for everything. They need you to feed them, to coax them to sleep, to dress them, to bathe them. You feel that weight of responsibility so strongly, and it’s overwhelming in those early days.

And then, little by little, they start to become more independent. At first it’s just rolling over, then sitting up on their own, starting to eat proper food, and before you know it, they’re up and walking about and heading off to school, to university, to their own home.

Today is one of those milestone moments for Ben. I finally have his nursery ready, and we’re going to try him out sleeping in his own room tonight. It’s been a long time coming – he’s 7 months today, and I’ve loved having him in the Snuzpod, just an arms length away from me when he stirs at night. But now, our close proximity is becoming more of a problem, and we are waking each other up in the night and finding it difficult to resettle. It definitely feels like time.

And yet, now we’ve come to it, I’m feeling that familiar bittersweet taste in my mouth. It’s the first real step towards being independent, a baby step, sure, but still a step. And although I burst with pride at seeing my children become more independent, there is something else there too – a sadness that with every step towards independence, they need me less and less. It’s fleeting, and it runs beneath the pride, but it’s definitely there, and much more so this time around with Ben that it was with Max. I think there’s something especially bittersweet about watching your last child go through all these developments, knowing that it’s the last time you’ll experience it all.

I think when it comes down to it, the uneasy mixture of pride and sadness at watching them grow up is what parenting is all about. You’re always letting them go, bit by bit, coaching them to need you less and less, so that they can grow up and become independent adults. Ultimately, that’s my goal as a parent and I hope I can raise two independent, kind, and compassionate men.

But that doesn’t stop me having that bittersweet moment as I kiss my little baby goodnight and lay him down in his huge cot for the first time.

Night night little one, sleep tight.

And who knows what tonight holds, maybe you’ll be back in with us tomorrow 🙂

 

The Ordinary Moments
  • I remember that feeling so well. I don’t think I slept that first night, I just stared at the monitor willing him to wake up so that I had an excuse to snuggle him in with us again. It feels like such a big step! Hopefully it goes well though! x

    • Katy

      It’s a huge step isn’t it! I didn’t have to wait too long for Ben to wake up 🙂 Sleeping in his own room hasn’t magically improved his sleeping sadly!

  • Such a loving and heart felt post. Ben’s room looks amazing and you are the best mum these boys could have. ❤️

  • Natalie @memeandharri

    This made me feel a little weepy, such a beautiful post. Our lovely boys are growing up #ordinarymoments

  • Laura Little Ladies Big World

    So gorgeous i love that photo and it is such a big thing isn’t it? I hope it goes/has gone well xx #TheOrdinaryMoments

    • Thank you! It’s gone pretty well actually – he’s sleeping pretty much the same as he was in our room (which isn’t great, but at least it’s not worse!)

  • Helena “TheQueenofCollage” Ash

    All the feelings here. I can recall my eldest rustling in the moses basket next to me and in my half awake state thinking what’s that? Oh I have a gorgeous baby. I’m starting to see little ones like butterflies and we are the ones to give them wings. #ordinarymoments

  • Donna Wishart

    Oh bless him. Those months have whizzed by and that bittersweet feeling is one I am so familiar with. BUT his new room looks SO beautiful! x

  • Oh I hope that first night went well. I remember it so clearly myself. My eldest moved into his own room at five months, my youngest at fifteen!

    • Aww, I think that says it all really! It’s so hard to let go sometimes, and I do love the comfort of knowing he’s right there. But he’s doing surprisingly well in his own room so far – fingers crossed it continues!

  • Mary

    That is such a gorgeous pic!! I totally know what you mean about the rollercoaster of parenting – fear, joy, sadness and delight! I wish you luck with this new milestone and hope he settles x #Ordinarymoments

  • Aaaw I hope he had a good first night. I know what you mean – each new step is a step away from us. It’s so hard being a parent! I remember being really upset the first night that ours moved into their own room, but it soon becomes the norm.

    And congratulations because someone loved this post so much, they added it to the BlogCrush linky! Feel free to collect your “I’ve been featured” blog badge 🙂 #blogcrush